In recent newsletters/blog posts I have been sharing what I have received from my higher-self. I would like to expand on that a bit more.
We are here to live. To experience. To feel emotion.
But are we? Are we really doing that on a daily basis?
I know that I have a tendency to dwell upon and experience past history–oftentimes really reliving what happened. Sometimes it’s good. Sometimes, not so much.
But, in my day to day existence, I find myself on autopilot. Lately, I’ve been trying to remind myself to experience every moment. That’s not an easy task after all these years of living on autopilot.
However, one surefire method of ensuring this is to step away from my comfort zone. In that space, I feel everything for it is all new and different. In that space, I feel ALIVE.
I’ll share something very personal with you.
A few days ago, I had a meltdown. A scream-at-the-top-of-my-voice-throw-objects-around-my-home-slamming-doors-hissy-fit-of-a-meltdown. And then I cried as if my heart were breaking.
I had reached my breaking point. The life I am living is no longer enough.
It’s not enough to just exist.
It’s not enough to just wish away each day until it is time to go home.
It’s not enough to stare blankly forward during my daily commute, never really connecting with the world around me.
It’s not enough to just get by.
It’s not enough.
And, although living and experiencing in the daily tasks can be done, should be done, sometimes we have to shake ourselves out of our fog, so to speak. I decided to take stock of my life and see where I was holding back.
So, I asked myself, where do I dare not go?
Where in my life is fear holding me back?
What dream have I hidden away in the recesses of my being, unexplored and unseen, afraid to bring it to the light of day?
I will share with you here, now, a dream of mine that I dared not examine closely:
I want to sing.
I want to sing opera. I want to sing standards.
I want to express my being by singing; and not by karaoke, fun or silliness, though there is that aspect and it has its place.
No, I mean singing in a way that bares my soul and connects my heart with those who are a witness to my voice. I want to touch each and every person that hears me sing and have them experience through me, this truth:
You. Are. Love.
Oh, but the magnitude of this dream has kept me unwilling to be visible. You cannot hide, with a vision that large.
And, sad to say, I have always been discouraged from singing:
Stop singing, Tracy.
You’re too loud, Tracy.
Tracy, you’re tone deaf.
Oh my gosh, do you have to sing so much, Tracy?
Are any of these true?
But, I believed it and kept my dream in such a deep, dark place that it could only become visible in the midst of a meltdown.
I am finally going to honor this dream, this vision. My first step was to share it with all of you. You are all my witnesses, you see.
So, I ask you, where have YOU been holding back?
What dream have you been afraid to live?
Where in your life have you believed the lie that you cannot be or do?
Open up to that desire in your heart that is calling to be birthed through you. You know the one I’m talking about—you know you do.
Share below that dream you dared not believe would ever come into being and let us be a witness to you.
In love, I am